Sk8 or die bro!

Who leaves a skateboard in the bathroom? Honestly!

Bye bye bye oye ve.

So know what's awesome? Coming home to your roommate, Shirley, playing Nsync in concert on tv. Really loud. And she is in her late 20's. And she didn't turn it down.

Oh another day on the ranch. Giddy up!

Sigh.

I was excited to come home today because Shirley was at work and Doris went home for the weekend. But oh no. Shirley's douchebag boyfriend is sleeping in her room while Shirley is at work. And his spastic rat dog is also here. Did I mention he has a key to the place? I have slammed the doors, loudly, but sadly for me, he is still here. Man I don't want to have to fight the bitch.

I love my "home!!!"

Update: The douchebag has left the ranch, but his dog is still here. Awesome.

I'm here for the gang bang.

I received this text a couple days ago from Shirley:

"6 of my guy friends were wondering if they could crash in the living room Friday night."

Not only does Shirley run a doggy day care for her dog and her boyfriend's dog, but now she is running a motel. Sweet!

Yee-haw!

Giddy up.

I live in a townhome that has a lasso on the wall, cowboy boots atop the 1980s big screen TV, and airplane blankets used as accent pieces. I also have a roommate, Shirley, that slams doors (complete with cowbells), does laundry at 4am and talks in a ridiculously loud voice. Her boyfriend also once left a box of donuts in my bathroom ‘cause he drank himself sick. At least it made for a nice snack when I got home. She also rents out her room with her friend, Doris.

This is my adventure until I make enough money to live on my own. Or win the lottery.